I've wished on stars. I've crossed my fingers. I've prayed to a God who does not listen.
And still, I wish.
I wish I could have seen it sooner. The hole inside of me that craves so much love yet can never be filled...and that you could fill it.
But I was blind, willingly. Stumbling from one thing to another, each one used to build me up. Make me stronger.
Only for me to tear it down.
To re-invent myself again and again.
I wish I could have touched you so many times...held my cool palm to your body, felt your heat flow into me.
But my mind told me things would go out of control. Yet that is what I wanted, isn't it?
To lose control then pull it back again.
I wish it didn't hurt to lose you. I wish I didn't have to hurt you.
But I hurt. And I hurt you. And we hurt, together or seperate.
I wish I could stay away from you. To run far away from this love.
But I can't. I don't really want to anyway.
I run to you, cling to you, beg you....anything is possible....if I want it.
If I wish for it.